Gag stocking stuffers can be a lot of fun, and in many households across the country they’re an annual tradition. For some, the gag is what is most looked forward to, and helps them appreciate their other non-gag gifts all the more. Add a bit of humor to your holiday season with some of the best oddball stocking stuffers we’ve found.
Here’s everything you need to come out unscathed from some of the nastiest public toilets out there. When you’ve gotta go you’ve gotta go, and it could be that your only options is a stall that looks like it hasn’t been cleaned in ages. With the seat cover, antiseptic wipes, and disposable gloves you’ll make it through.
$6.70
The Avenging Narwhal Action Figure
What did those poor penguins ever do to that narwhal to make him so vengeful? Whatever it was, he’s not so happy and he’s taking it out with his giant tusk. He may run into a problem when he impales too many penguins and doesn’t have any room left on his unicorn horn.
Prices Vary
They say cursing represents a lack of vocabulary, but this little invention will have you coming up with all sorts of ways to get your point across. Many of them are hilarious, and just fine to say out loud and in public because they put too words together in a way that makes them funny, without actually using swear words.
$9.93
This little coin purse helps you keep things separated so you don’t go spending your weed money on food or vice versa. It has some retro Japanese graphics on it as well, and includes plenty of pot paraphernalia so it’s easy to recognize what it’s for.
$5.89
If you’ve ever wanted to zing somebody good, and not have them know what the heck you’re saying, these Shakespearean insult bandages will have you biting your thumb at everyone. Just be prepared for bookworms to call you out on your insults and be prepared for a battle of words.
$6.86
Emergency Underpants Dispenser
Have a pair of emergency underpants always at the ready. This dispenser makes them come out one at a time, just like a box of Kleenex. The container holds 5 pair of underwear, and the manufacturer says you can play it really safe and keep a box of them in strategic locations.
$17.95
Tighty whiteys work so well to hold everything in place down below, why not on top of your head? This looks like a pair of underwear with the leg holes covered up so that it snugly fits you all the way around. Face it, you’ve probably worn underwear on your head before to be silly. Now you can have a pair specifically designated for it.
Prices Vary
Nothing get those digestive juices flowing like the smell of bread toasting. If you want that smell to waft through the air even when you’re not making toast, this is the air freshener to get. It will probably make you hungry throughout the day, so be warned, you may find yourself actually making toast more often.
Prices Vary
This looks like a nice metal box to hold keepsakes, except for the fact that it’s labeled Random Crap on the top. When you look more closely at the designs on this, you’ll notice that while it looks elegant, it’s actually pretty random, and much of it makes no sense.
Prices Vary
This book is filled with plenty of examples of notes left by those that didn’t want to make a scene, but wanted to get their message across. It will definitely get your mind coming up with your own perfectly worded barb aimed at someone that’s been irking you lately.
$8.00
There’s really no way that anyone has ever dreamed of drinking their coffee from a mug that looks like a toilet. That’s why it makes this the perfect gag gift. The worst part is that coffee, with it’s dark brown texture, looks just like a bowlful of you-know-what when placed into a toilet mug. Gross!
$12.99
There’s finally a Crazy Cat Lady action figure that you can pose and play with. The only person crazier than a Crazy Cat Lady is the person that would play with an action figure like this. But it makes a great stocking stuffer for that person in your life that is teetering on the brink of having too many cats. Keep them in check and send a message with this gift.
$14.50
Know someone that has to stop every 15 minutes to use the bathroom on a road trip? Let her know that on the next trip you’re going to be making record time. This device makes it so women can relieve themselves even when there’s no bathroom in sight.
$9.97
Narwhalicorn “Half Unicorn – Half Narwhal”
They call narwhals the “unicorn of the sea” so it only makes sense that this hybrid would exist. The front half is a narwhal, complete with the signature unicorn-style horn. The bottom half is all unicorn, so basically horse legs, but with a nice rainbow colored tail.
$7.95
Let your lunch go incognito with these disguise sandwich bags that dress your food up with monocles, glasses, and moustaches. It’s not exactly clear why you’d want to do this, but goofy gifts are at the heart of any gag. Anything that generates a sarcastic thank you is fair game.
$6.99
If you’ve got a boo boo bacon can make it better. These bandages look like streaky strips of bacon, and will make you hungry as you heal. There haven’t been any studies that show bacon Band-Aids make cuts heal faster, but they sure make them look more delicious.
$6.44
It’s not like the name says, it’s actual lip balm that you can use to keep your lips from drying out. All the good names must have been taken, because this is actually a high quality balm, and the only gag here is the name. There are plenty of flavors to choose from, but we’re partial to the lemonade.
$11.99
The purpose of a flask is to fly under the radar and take a swig of your favorite spirit without being detected. Forget about it with this giant flask. Nothing about it is discrete, and it doesn’t fit into any pocket we’ve ever seen. But it sure is fun to use!
Prices Vary
You can set up miniature crime scenes around the office or in your home with this roll of mini crime scene tape. It looks just like the full sized kind, only you can use it on a smaller scale to make little nooks and crannies off limits to passersby.
Prices Vary
This adds new meaning to picking your nose, and in this case you’re actually jamming a pencil up it. This one isn’t a bad habit, and no boogers result from it, but you’ll want to do it over a trash can so that the shavings have somewhere to go.
$4.46
Show off a fake fanny through your boxer shorts with these bum shorts. They are like regular boxers everywhere else, but the backside reveals to plastic cheeks so you’ll be mooning anyone that cares to look your way.The hardest part isn’t getting into them, it’s finding an audience that appreciates your sophisticated humor.
$8.74
When it’s time to cook up the holiday meal, you can offer to make the turkey. When it’s time to do the carving, whip out a can of inflatable turkey and start blowing it up. Go as far as getting ready to carve it and see how many people think you’re nuts. Be sure to have an actual turkey waiting in the wings.
$11.82
This adhesive bandages have a photorealistic picture of macaroni and cheese on them, so you can have this creamy delight with you while your cut gets covered so it can heal faster. You may want to grab a spoon and start digging in, but remember, this is just a Band-Aid.
Prices Vary
Find someone that enjoys receiving these cat butt magnets, and you’ll have to wonder about them. They depict the derrieres of an assortment of felines, and not much else is known about the motivation of the company that created them. It’s the sort of zany gift that will leave them saying “huh?”.
Prices Vary
Unicorns Are Jerks Coloring Book
Bet you didn’t know this, but unicorns are actually real jerks. That’s the premise of this coloring book, which sets the record straight on these mystical animals. They are shown doing all sorts of rude things in this book, like texting on their phones during a movie. The nerve!
Prices Vary
If you’ve got a bacon-themed gift you’re giving someone, the only logical wrapping paper is bacon wrapping paper. It will get them salivating to find out what’s inside. If you want to be extra cruel, give the gift long before they’re allowed to open it so they’ll have to look at bacon every day in anticipation.
$3.99
Bigfoot is not really equated with fresh smells, in fact quite the opposite, with all of that hair he probably doesn’t smell good at all. But this air freshener is shaped in the form of a sasquatch, and to be more specific it is modeled after the famous bigfoot footage from 1967 that has bigfoot looking back at the camera.
$5.21
Here’s a single pair of underpants in case of an emergency. Sometimes you just need a pair of underpants to get you until you can change into a fresh pair of real ones. This is like keeping a spare donut in your car, it’s not supposed to replace your tire, just to get you to the service center. Same theory here, and you can keep this handy in case of an emergency.
$5.45
This little guy is pretty happy all the time, but perhaps he’s at his happiest when he’s being used. That’s because his member gets placed right into the open bottle for a snug fit. The whole time he’s got his arms outstretched in joyful glee. We should all be so happy.
$6.88
Inflatable Unicorn Horn for Cats
Your cat will absolutely love being dressed up as a unicorn. Not! This is something that should only be placed on them long enough for a few selfies with your “unicat”, and then immediately removed. Not because it hurts them, but c’mon, give them their dignity.
$5.97
This book is one of the funniest bedtime stories of all time. There’s even an audio version narrated by none other than Samuel L. Jackson. It captures the frustration and irritation of a parent that just wants their child to go to sleep so they can get on with their night or go to sleep as well.
$11.96
9 DIY Silly Stocking Stuffer Ideas
Make them laugh with this Tic Tac label that turns ordinary white Tic Tacs into “Snowman Poop”. These labels are as easy as printing them off and cutting them down to the right size. Makes the perfect funny stocking stuffer this year.
These magnets will make them think that some alien creature has invaded their stocking. You can make different microbes following their instructions, so you can put more than one in there, or just leave one in there to keep them guessing.
Everyone knows that if you’ve been a bad little boy or girl this year you’re going to get coal in your stocking. Make it more fun with these cute little lumps of coal that smile at them and make them see it’s just for fun.
These sachets resemble articles of clothing, like socks and underpants that resemble Underoos. They give off a pleasant smell and are great for keeping sock and underwear drawers smelling nice.
These crayons are made out of crayons that were down to their nubs so you are saving the old ones from getting tossed out and creating new ones that can be used again. Maybe not a gag stocking stuffer, but they’ll still enjoy getting it.
When they first see a walnut in their stocking they’re going to be confused. When they open it up to find that it’s a fairy walnut, they’re going to be amazed. This is the perfect stocking stuffer if they’ve shown an interest in fairy doors and other fairy related things.
This necklace is hiding a secret mirror on the back of it. That makes it better than a normal necklace because they’ll be able to see themselves when they need to just by flipping it around. Flip it back and it’s a necklace again.
Here’s a fun ornament that is made out of polymer clay. It’s a squirrel peeking his head out of a stocking, so it’s totally apropos as a stocking stuffer. The cuteness of the squirrel is what really drives this stocking stuffer home.
Give these as a stocking stuffer for the manly man in your life that likes to carry a pack of matches with him on camping trips and woods walks. It’s covered in maps and has been dubbed road trip matches.
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